OH NOOO!!

the one thing i wanted to avoid during this season in my walk with God has happened...

i've developed a crush on someone...dundunDUN!!!

i remember when i first started feeling it i prayed and prayed to God to take this feeling away. it's been about a couple of months but this feeling of interest just keeps increasing slowly. i prayed last night about it...and i don't know how to react to it.

1. like most ppl, i've been heartbroken and so i'm REALLY cautious about being a relationship, if ever, i do decide to get involved in...
2. i actually and honestly DON'T want to like this person (if that makes sense)
3. i don't feel like this person would ever be interested in me anyway

i talked to my sis about it today and she said to not get ahead of myself. i agree. but it's SO hard when you have those weird feelings towards someone! i'm sure these feelings will pass, but it's just surprising to me b/c it actually takes ALOTTTTT for me to like someone....like, ALOT. growing up, i had a tough time developing those kinds of feelings towards guys. it could be linked to how my biological father left us and whatnot, iuno. as far as i can remember, this feeling i have is only the 2nd time i've had that like butterflys-in-my-stomach kinda feeling (it's not THAT much yet b/c i don't know him too well yet). but the first guy i had that feeling towards was...umm...a heartbreaker. and i know it's people's natural tendencies to be attracted to the same type of person, so ..yah...-=o\

so i've decided to avoid him as much as possible.

hmm....please pray that i keep focused on God. please pray for me for continued strength in this busy season coming ahead. and please pray that God protects my hearts and emotions because i am an emotional person (i really wish i wasn't).

thank you.

p.s man, hormones suck sometimes!